'My daughter isn't [your] practice child': Sister-in-law "Lila" uses 5-year-old niece as parenting “practice,” mom finally puts a stop to it after overhearing her say “come to mama”

When you take care of other peoples' kids, either as the go-to free babysitter at family events or as a paid full-time nanny, you gain experience in childcare that can come in handy when you finally have children of your own. However, it is a really odd thing to go into these experiences with the explicit intention of rehearsing motherhood, as one woman, Lila, did with her sister-in-law's child for a time. She fed the 5-year-old without asking, insisted on carrying her around in public, and even gave mom unsolicited parenting advice despite not having kids of her own. This all came to a head when Lila told the girl to "come to Mommy."

The mom, understandably, totally snapped, reminding Lila that she isn't the girl's mother. Her family told her she should've been gentler with Lila, but in my opinion, they should've been more understanding of the situation from the mom's perspective. She felt like her authority as a parent was being undermined right to her face. Sometimes saying no, even to family, is the only way to assert your boundaries. 

Author image for Ely Bulnes Ely Bulnes
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family drama baby toddler married with children motherhood niece parenting aunt dad family boundaries daughter raising kids mom parents
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